How Addiction Affects Your Loved Ones

December 2017

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How Addiction Affects Your Loved Ones

How exactly does addiction impact you and your loved ones?

Father battling addiction with his kids present

Drug addiction destroys lives; not solely the lives of those addicted, but the lives of their loved ones also. Gradually, the addicted loses interest in their loved ones and rational behavior is always far from expected. More often than not, addicts exhibit “fits” which push their loved ones away.

The drug epidemic in New York City is fast rising and families and friends have lost someone dear to them, either through drug related deaths or through the irrational impulsive actions often associated addiction.

It is glaring the effects drugs have on the addicted.  What the society sometimes fails to realize is that there is a certain class of people who are more affected than the addicted themselves; the wives, the husbands, the children, the parents, the best friends, the loved ones.


How Are Loved Ones Affected ?

Your loved ones Suffer Abuse

The irrational actions which effuse during the aftermath of drug intake does not take into consideration the consequences of certain actions. This is the root of the abuse which the addicted lets his loved ones go through either physically or emotionally. Denying the loved ones of certain attention, verbally abusing them or in some cases, physically abusing them can lead to depression and anxiety in them.

Health Risks

The use of intravenous drugs and needles exposes the addicted to certain blood borne diseases that can be transmitted to their partners. Having to take care of an addicted loved one and at the same time, battling with certain diseases such as HIV and hepatitis is not in any way a pleasant experience.

Financial Instability

There are times when families of the addicted have to fend for themselves. It may not be as a result of the family being originally financially handicapped. Addiction is what it is, there is no mincing words about it. When the addicted needs more drugs, he spends what ever money he finds, not minding if that is the last of the family’s money. This happens gradually till the family becomes very financially unstable and the notion of living sober will usually become more attractive.

Children Suffer

A worst case scenario is that of both of either parents being addicts. In New York City, most drug addiction cases include, heroin, prescription drugs, fentanyl, and opioids. These drugs are easily addictive and when parents are addicts, this takes a great toll on the children. School and education may become a a forgotten story, and the attention, care and love every child needs would definitely be lacking in the lives of the children, this affects their overall development in all ramifications, either psychologically, emotionally, or physically.

Addiction impacts the whole family

In New York City, the drug epidemic has been exceptionally elusive, both to the state as a whole and to the most integral parts of the state; families and loved ones. The only way to avoid these situations from occurring is by embracing sobriety. Sober living puts your life back on track and in perspective. It gives a new form of hope and joy to loved ones and you have a great opportunity for a second chance in life. Sober living is the best action to take in order to stop our loved ones from feeling so much pain. Valley Spring can help you or your loved one take the next step. We have care coordinators and interventionist available. Call us and we will be happy to help get you sorted with our premier NYC sober living residency and recovery services offered in Manhattan.

Feel free to read our previous blog about The Importance of Having Good Mentors in Your Life

The Importance of Having Good Mentors in Your Life

Good mentors can help shape your life for the better

In favor of good mentors: In a world containing over 8 billion people, it is typical that passions and dreams differ. With these dreams come the tasking pursuits of accomplishment—a journey that defines one’s life and nobody is born with a map with which they can embark on their journeys. Fortunately, there is a social compass with which one can direct their career paths and life on the axis of their dreams and goals—mentors are the compasses.

They say mentors exhibit what the shape of achievement is like, they provide guidance, advice, and listen to your situation to proffer the necessary steps for you to take to make a success of it; they often had been in your position at some point in time, and so are the ultimate social orifice through which you can channel your inquiries on what decisions to make. If you consider the place of psychological mentorship and its tendency of unexpected transformations in addicts subjected to sober living, you would realize largely how invaluable mentoring can be.

Guy mentoring young man teaching him about life and sober living


In such densely populated regions and cities like Manhattan in NYC, it is no doubt that success emerges mostly from your ability to scale over competition and prove qualifies enough to be at the top, and what is a better way to gain such sophisticated capacity than to be guided by someone who has been there and has scaled beyond high heights. Whether your endeavor is entrepreneurial in nature or you are starting on your road to recovery and considering drug treatment and sober living, the following reasons inspired by John Rampton at Inc.  should prompt you to get yourself a mentor.

Mentors are Stores of Experience and Knowledge

Benjamin Franklin once said, “I forget when you tell me, I may recall when you teach me, but I learn when you involve me.” There is often a learning curve in every affair, or adventure one partakes in in life. With a mentor, that curve is significantly shortened, because they provide most of the information you would need to learn fast and grow with minimal mistakes. You should have known that mistake costs two things: time and resources, and mentors save you those assets on the contrary.

Mentors enhance your Professional and Personal Development

It is a known behavior of mentors to polish your inner gifts and abilities rather than plant their own in you. They encourage to do better in what you are driven to do. The mentor gives you to the task that test your personal qualities, your patience, your intelligence, and all the traits you need for your personal and professional ecosystem.

They Are Great Sources of Encouragement

Mentor providing encouragement for sober living and personal growth

Oprah Winfrey once said that “mentors are those who illuminate the lights of hope that rests within you.” Even in a city as dense in population as Manhattan, you can feel so alone; you can face circumstances that can drive you into depression, but a mentor can save the day with encouraging words that make you see the glory in your situation, and get back to work. Individuals being rehabilitated in sober living homes, being rescued from the cold grip of addiction, are some individuals that are great enjoyers of the fruits of mentorship. A mentor could just be all you need in those times of difficulty.


They enhance our Levels of discipline

They understand the challenges associated with the path you have chosen to take, and they know better what levels of discipline demanded to accomplish your life’s goals. You might not be meeting up with those demands, but the mentor can help you do that. They can make you understand what the consequences are if you fail to attain such degrees of focus and discipline, and correspondingly spur you up.

Mentors help you avoid Mistakes

A wise man once said, “wisdom is not always achieved by failing. First, it is best obtained by reading the epistles of other people’s lives.” Your mentor most likely had gone through what you are going through, and so know what doses of actions to recommend for you so as to achieve success in life, and avoid the mistakes people often make following a similar career path. They improve your chances of having a safe trip on your life’s journey.

They Spot Our Achilles’ Heels

Faults that linger with you in your career path constitute impedance that slows down your growth and enhances your imperfection. A mentor is a sort of refiner, one who is highly skilled at identifying those flaws and sieving them off. Good mentors are blunt and honest; they do not pat you on the back when you fail, they offer corrections and motivate you to strive harder.

Mentors do not cost a Fortune

As much as they do not cost a dime to get, they are a priceless asset. They a worth more than rubies, yet they can be gotten free of charge. So why not take advantage of the invaluable possession given freely?

They can provide Connection

Mentor connections to a new network

Your mentors can take you to seminars and conferences; they can be that link between you and the wider portions of your industry orcareer. You can meet the persons you need for a boost in your career through your mentor. This even makes them more invaluable, and a possession that can mean so much for the evolution of your career.


The Journal of Applied Psychology had made the finding that people who undergo mentoring obtain more success in their career than those doing without them. Mentors are a great indicator that you are smart enough to learn from the past to make the future as excellent as perfection itself—you have all the reasons to get yourself one.

Valley Spring is connected with terrific sober coaches and sober mentors to help you achieve sobriety and get your life on the right track. Please feel free to visit Valley Spring to learn more about our sober living and recovery services and based in Manhattan. If you need more information about sober living, feel free to visit our page all about sober houses.


Feel free to read our previous blog about Stepping out of your comfort zone in NYC

Stepping out of your comfort zone in NYC

The importance of stepping out of your comfort zone, and how NYC is a perfect place to grow.

To fully grasp the concept of this topic, it is important we understand the concept of the comfort zone. Lifehacker defined the comfort zone as a behavioral territory where your behaviors and daily activity fit into a pattern and routine that isn’t considered to be stressful and doesn’t entail you taking a risk on a regular basis.

Our comfort zone usually provides a feeling of familiarity, certainty and to a large degree, provides of security. When you step outside your comfort zone, we are sending internal messages that we are ready to take a risk, and open our self up to the realm of possibilities — which tends to bring with it — great uncertainty and anxiety.  Most times, we really don’t have an idea what’s going to happen next and how we are going to deal with it.

Humans are naturally wired to seek comfort, they are generally described as creatures of comfort, for this reason, we find it difficult leaving our comfort zone. On the surface, there is no serious harm being in your comfort zone; when you consider, however, growth rarely comes without hardship — your comfort zone can definitely hinder your self-development and curiosity to try new things.  At one point or another, every addict has to step outside their comfort zone if sobriety is to be achieved. Making a decision like going to rehab and continuing the after care with outpatient and a sober home requires great strength from within.

Woman stepping out of her comfort zone to sober living

If you realize that you are not making progress in different spheres of life, either intentionally or unintentionally, then it is time for you pick yourself up and challenge yourself to perform at your peak. Stepping outside your comfort zone is key. We see examples of people stepping out of the comfort zone as necessary for personal growth. We can’t expect to grow and evolve in life if we stick to a continuous routine. Attaining new milestones involves stepping into uncharted territory with the knowledge that we might not succeed.

However, it is important that we take the risk as this is what will help us to grow. Leaving our comfort zone will also demand that we drop certain habits that which might be setting us back. For example, if you are a fun-loving person it might be the time you consider dropping some those fun activities and be prepared to live a sober life. Sober living helps one to focus on what is important.

In other cases, leaving your comfort zone might also require you change your location completely, move into an uncharted territory of the zone. If you are considering leaving your comfort zone, New York City presents the perfect challenge, the huge skyscrapers and subways can be really intimidating for first-timers. The city never sleeps and comprises of all you need in a fast-paced metropolitan city. If you or your loved ones struggle with addiction, please speak to the professionals at Valley Spring to help you take that next step toward growth in personal recovery! See more about the NYC sober living residency and recovery services provided.


Feel free to read our previous blog about How To Keep Sober During Festive Periods









How To Keep Sober During Festive Periods

Sober living done properly during festivities.

There is booze almost everywhere during festive periods. If you are just recovering from an addiction to alcohol/drugs and maybe even residing in a sober living or halfway house, then this ‘how to remain sober during festive periods’ is a topic inspired by Kate’s blog ( is one that should ultimately be of interest to you.

Temptation from people drinking and planning for sober living during festive periods

Staying sober in NYC during the festive periods can be a very difficult thing to do because alcohol will be served at almost all events, your friends and colleagues with bottles up halfway into their mouths ask you questions about why you are not drinking, and some others will tell you ”it’s just this night”.

Fortunately, sober living residences are a great place to socialize with like-minded people who have the common goal to stay sober – plus, sober parties are nights that can truly be remembered! Obviously it’s not realistic to hang out with sober friends 24/7, so you will need a plan to survive the festive season without losing your sobriety to the booze around you. Here are a few tips on how to remain sober during the festive periods.

 1. Have a Pick-Up line: You cannot explain to everyone who asks you to take a drink or asks you why you are not drinking about how you decided to remain sober. The truth is that most people are in denial of being addicted to alcohol one way or the other so when you explain to them the reason you have decided to remain sober even in the middle of all the festivities, such individual tries to convince you to have a glass.

A simple response like ‘No thank you’, ‘I don’t drink’ or ”I don’t drink anymore” can save you the stress, you can also decide to be funny with your pickup lines and say something like ”I don’t want to walk on my head” or ”I would miss my way home” can work, chances are that the alcohol is already kicking in on the individual, and he will just laugh and move along.

2. Have a Backup Plan: You should not draw attention to yourself by sipping water from plastic cups in Manhattan, doing so will make people offer you drinks. You can buy your soda and wrap in a brown bag, drink from it at intervals. No one except you knows what you are drinking but because it is concealed in a brown paper bag now one will pay attention, and you can keep your sober living forward moving.Female having a back up plan for sober living during festive periods

3. Leave Early: This can come in handy when the temptation to take alcohol begins to kick in, nobody says you have to wait until the end of any party or event.

4. Get Busy: Keeping yourself busy can help remain sober during the festive period. You can volunteer yourself at charitable organizations around you, feed the homeless initiatives, and if your sobriety is strong, you can even help others who are not living as well and just starting the journey to being sober.

5. Plan a Sober Party: in a bid to avoid events where booze is served you can plan your party and not include any alcohol on the menu. Invite family and friends who support your sobriety and also invite other sober individuals – you don’t know you might just be saving someone from a relapse because they could have attended another party where they’ll drink.

6. Remind yourself why you should remain sober and living good.

7. Continue doing what has been working for you. Regular exercise, yoga, and meditation should be on the cards and try to spend time with people who care.

8. If you find yourself in a situation and you begin to have strong desire to take alcohol, ask yourself this question ”what will alcohol do To help this situation?”

9. Be determined to remain sober during and after the festive period.

10. Attend group meetings: be sure to meet with other sober people and discuss your challenges.

If you have been thinking about how to remain sober during festive periods, hope this article has been of helpful. If you need more support, contact Valley Spring and they will help get you connected to a terrific sober living residency and excellent recovery services in NYC.

Feel free to read out previous blog about How To Manage Stress and Pain Without Alcohol

How To Manage Stress and Pain Without Alcohol

Learn important keys to sober living in order to manage stress and pain without alcohol

The world we live in today is stressful. It is not easy to achieve find strong sobriety and good quality sober homes these days. Causes of stress include work, school-family relationships, and anxieties about money. The loss of a loved one, a breakup, and other factors cause pain. In movies and popular culture, alcohol is the go-to cure for pain. It is quite common to see people using a glass of wine or bottles of alcohol to calm down and relax.

For many people, alcohol drinking is a way of reducing stress. They use it to numb problems they face. However, taking alcohol to relieve stress simply postpones the problems they face. Alcohol will wear off, but the problems remain. Apart from not solving their problems, alcohol can even cause more problems.  Injuries as a result of drinking, health problems like liver disease have a higher chance of occurring to people who are not sober.

How can you stay sober? How can you achieve sober living and manage your stress and pain without resorting to alcohol? This article is inspired by Kate’s blog at the sober school and provides 5 ways to manage stress and pain without alcohol.


Since stress is related to the way a person reacts emotionally or mentally to events, you need to engage in activities that can help you relax and take your mind off the problems you are facing. Exercise helps to relax the body and the mind. Alcohol should not be used to induce relaxation. So take a walk, go running, cycling or engage in other forms of exercise. Highly recommended are Yoga, Tai Chi and other forms of exercise that combine mental attention with body movements. What is more, exercise induces the release of endorphins leaving you feeling good. It may seem difficult, especially in the beginning, but exercise can go a long way on your way to better living and sobriety.

Sober living dude working out feeling good reducing stress

Engage in a hobby

To help you remain sober, find something you particularly enjoy doing. Learn a musical instrument, read a book, keep a garden. The main point is you should seek to find joy in the things you do. Valley Spring finds importance it scheduling your time properly — especially considering that addicts early in recovery tend to self-sabotage with too much free time on their hands. Schedule enough where you can look forward to something without feeling overwhelmed from too much on your plate. Think of something you enjoy doing, and then pursue it!

Laugh and listen to refreshing music

Laughter helps to reduce the stress hormone cortisol. Listening to refreshing music also helps to reduce stress and cope with pain. Sober living is good living.

Improve your health

When you are physically strong, and healthy your body can cope with stress better. Thus, eat nutritious foods, drink plenty of water and sleep well. Taking care of yourself physically can help alleviate stress and pain.

Talk to a friend

There are times when you feel overwhelmed with anxieties and stress. Talking to a friend from another sober living or halfway house can help to unburden yourself and alleviate your worries. Really, speaking to someone (where in recovery or not) is usually helpful. Furthermore, the new perspective or insight from friends can help you solve your problems too.

Alcohol is not a stress reliever; rather it is a stress delayer. True, it is not easy to be sober.  But no matter the stress you undergo or the pain you feel, do not resort to alcohol to manage it. Rather follow the steps above for healthier and sober living.


Feel free to read our previous blog about 5 Signs It Is Time To Stop Drinking and learn more about our premier sober living residency in NYC.